Friday, June 13, 2008

For My Tatay!

After celebrating mothers day now comes fathers day! in a couple of days we are all going to pay tribute and celebrate fathers day! as i am typing this post for today i actually can't focus on what am i gonna say about my father when all i can think about are the heartaches he had caused me. not only with me but most especially to my very dear nanay. i have actually posted here during my blogs early days about my relationship with my father. everything was there, my agony, hatred and heartaches!

My tatay wasn't a perfect father. but as i think back with all the things that he had done, i realized if my father wasn't like the way he was before maybe i wasn't also the person that i am today. He taught me very big lessons in life. i became so responsible not only for myself but most especially for my family. i stand as the bread winner and i didn't complain though sometimes i can't avoid to think why i was doing it instead of him? but after that i found the answer to my question.. i was just being prepared so that when its time for me to be in my own life and my own family i could handle circumstances.

Its true that my father wasn't a responsible father to me, he used to be insensitive with our feelings, in fact i never experience to be cared by him when i was young as my mother had told me. but now that he has grandchildren i can see that he is a good grandfather. he had changed a lot since i matured and he had grown older. maybe he had lived and learn!

Now he is so fond in taking care of his "apo", he loves and enjoy playing with them. Not my children its my brother's. hehe! And i know for a fact that he can't wait to have his "apo" with me too! As years passed by my tatay had changed. he is now responsible ( cuz he's scared of me?!) hehe! we have a very smooth relationship in the family now, i can even cry and tell him about what's goin on with my life now which is very unlikely before. i didn't regret everything that had happened in our life cuz i also believe that it was God's way of teaching us lessons about life. and that paid off everything.

So now that its fathers day i want to let the whole world know how happy i am for having my tatay despite of evrything that he had caused us cuz if not because of him i won't be here, i won't be responsible and strong! and i am not shy anymore to say i love you tatay! and the craziest thing of all is that everytime he says he loves me i just can't help but cry. why? simply because i feel it in my heart! i know he meant it!


Heres a pic of my tatay and my niece Julia


3 comments:

Cielo said...

this is a very touching tribute to your dad.

your dad is so sweet to express to u as her child that he loves you...not all dads are as expressive as he is

Gles said...

thanks for the comment sis cielo, i really cried a river the first time i heard my tatay says he loves me cuz he was not used to tell me neither to my siblings.

Lerlyn said...

thats quite a story.. ur father is lucky to have u.

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